Before we get started, we'd like to announce that no, we don't know what the dolphins plan to do with the 6.999 billion other humans. But it sure as heck ain't free passes to Disney Land. Or even a coupon.
Our Staff
These brave individuals risk their lives to bring us the important information we need.
*Mystery Enigma, our mysterious leader
*Draco Dominus, head infiltrator whom we don't really like
*Milkshake the Cat Activist
*Dolphin Hacker 11.5
*Whistle
*Gene, the Lowly Intern.
*Mystery Enigma, our mysterious leader
*Draco Dominus, head infiltrator whom we don't really like
*Milkshake the Cat Activist
*Dolphin Hacker 11.5
*Whistle
*Gene, the Lowly Intern.
Our Mission
Well, we are the Dolphin Apocalypse Prevention Association! What did you THINK we did, host game shows? We support the dolphins, but now it is too much. They can coexist with humans, they can negotiate. But they chose not to. This is wrong. we will fight the dolphins until the end.
Our Theme Song
We have elected "The Dolphin Song" over "Radioactive".
Even though we like Radioactive, the Dolphin Apocalypse has absolutely nothing to do with radioactivity. AS FAR AS WE KNOW.
Here are the lyrics:
See them play in the moonlight
Watch them dance in the sun
They're the children of sadness- everyone
As they fight for each other
With no question or cause
They deserve to be treasured as a source of conquest
In their minds there is violence
And in time we will know
What the truth is about all we don't know-- they are EVIIIIIL
They have no room for not swimming
Though they've suffered much pain
From the race we call human - who are afraid of them
If I can only help to right a wrong
With my dolphin song
Then I'll have done what I set out to do
To destroy humanity
One person left
Then I'll have done what I promised you
Let us hope it's not too late
And that we can amend
All the pain we have suffered on
We were born with our freedom
Oh we were born with the truth
We have fins or flippers
We could choose
TO BE THE VERY BEST. LIKE NO ONE EVER WAS. TO CATCH THEM IS MY REAL TEST. TO TRAIN THEM IS MY CAUSE. I WILL SEARCH FAR AN--
Sorry. Our editor likes Pokemon WAAAAY too much.
*don't tell her we said that*
Even though we like Radioactive, the Dolphin Apocalypse has absolutely nothing to do with radioactivity. AS FAR AS WE KNOW.
Here are the lyrics:
See them play in the moonlight
Watch them dance in the sun
They're the children of sadness- everyone
As they fight for each other
With no question or cause
They deserve to be treasured as a source of conquest
In their minds there is violence
And in time we will know
What the truth is about all we don't know-- they are EVIIIIIL
They have no room for not swimming
Though they've suffered much pain
From the race we call human - who are afraid of them
If I can only help to right a wrong
With my dolphin song
Then I'll have done what I set out to do
To destroy humanity
One person left
Then I'll have done what I promised you
Let us hope it's not too late
And that we can amend
All the pain we have suffered on
We were born with our freedom
Oh we were born with the truth
We have fins or flippers
We could choose
TO BE THE VERY BEST. LIKE NO ONE EVER WAS. TO CATCH THEM IS MY REAL TEST. TO TRAIN THEM IS MY CAUSE. I WILL SEARCH FAR AN--
Sorry. Our editor likes Pokemon WAAAAY too much.
*don't tell her we said that*
Our logo
With much debate* from our staff, here is our logo:
It may be huge, but it looks really cool! It does make print documents awkward though. WE HAVE TO PRINT EVEEEEERY FRAME.
*"Debate" defined as "Milkshake wanted a cat".
It may be huge, but it looks really cool! It does make print documents awkward though. WE HAVE TO PRINT EVEEEEERY FRAME.
*"Debate" defined as "Milkshake wanted a cat".
JOIN OUR STAFF TODAY!
Simply comment on our blog! Please spread the word about our mission! And remember our motto: Never use Comic Sans! Also, remember Chuck Norris. On April Fool's we have an epic prank planned. Involving Chuck Norris.